My wife and I just completed a three-week vacation tour of the American southwest and mid-western states. In all we crossed twelve state borders and traveled 5,565 miles in 20 days. During our trip we visited six national parks, crossed the Rio Grande River twice, and went for a boat ride on the Colorado River. We hiked many canyon trails, saw many natural rock formations, delighted in the golden color of quaking Aspen leaves in sunlight, and witnessed amazing western sunsets. God knew what he was creating, simply magnificent!
We drove thru Alabama, Mississippi, Tennessee, Arkansas, Oklahoma, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Utah, Colorado, Wyoming, and Kansas. Our compliments to each of the highway departments and visitor’s centers. All were well maintained and the people were very friendly.
The land in the panhandle of Oklahoma and Texas is very flat and the interstate is straight as a rifle shot. On both sides of the road, far in the distance we saw hundreds of wind turbines. These structures, over two hundred feet tall, stretched for miles and miles. Agricultural farm land, pasture land, crops harvested and being harvested. Hundreds of large round hay bales, cotton bales wrapped in colorful shrouds and stacked as far as the eye could see.
Crossing into New Mexico, the landscape changed. It reminded me of western movies. Canyon lands appeared, giving the sense of gaining in altitude. Vegetation changed to small juniper and cedar trees. Fields covered with gray sage brush and lots of barren dirt in between.
Turning north and crossing into Colorado we visited the 4-Corners monument. I was able to lay on the ground and be in four states at the same time. A leg in New Mexico and Arizona, and an arm in Utah and Colorado.
Visiting six National Parks would take a book to describe. We hiked canyon trails and mountain trails, we picnicked lunch, we drank plenty of water, we took hundreds of photos. The parks were, Mesa Verde, Zion Canyon, Bryce Canyon, Canyon Lands, Arches, and Capitol Reef.
We met people from Dublin Georgia (Bull dogs), Huntsville Alabama (they were Auburn fans), and Pensacola Florida. We even met a classmate of Nick Saban when both were at Kent State and a former fast-pitch softball team mate of Kalen DeBoer from North Dakota. The locals liked to hear me talk. Can’t imagine why. The food in local restaurants was great (Calico’s in Fort Smith Arkansas). However, we did not see a Waffle House or Chick-fil-A once we crossed the Mississippi River.
During our road travel, my wife and I played a game for entertainment. Similar to the children’s game of “I spy.” We challenged each other to see who could be the first to spot a portable toilet house, more commonly known as a “porta-potty.” We would keep score. Road construction sites always have several. Building construction sites have some. But, the state of Arizona takes the prize for locations of porta-potties!
Driving from Page, Arizona to St. George, Utah we cross more pasture land. Suddenly, my wife screamed out, “Porta-potty” and pointed towards a large cow pasture. Sure enough, standing upright in the middle of open range was a gray portable toilet outhouse. Go figure!
As we continued on our journey, we began to notice and increase in roadside billboards. Several in a row advertising various eating establishments. Then came a billboard that read, “Get Food, Get Gas.” I started laughing at this, then the next billboard came into view. It read, “Gotta poop, we have what you need.” My wife began to shout “porta-potty, porta-potty over and over again. The building adjacent to the property was a porta-potty distribution center. There must have been a hundred portable units standing outside in a storage area. She is now, the Porta-potty Queen! We had fun.
Walter Allen is a graduate of TCHS and Auburn University. He is retired from the paper industry and is a published author. A former president of the Laurens County Museum Assoc. in Laurens, SC. He lives in Tuscaloosa County, AL.
